So life is continued on this beautiful day. I had a nice day today, sent my wife to a course for Little Caliph (LC) kindergarden and had my Double Shot Caramel Capp here in Gloria Jean’s (GJ) Kerinchi and surfing the net at the same time. A newly opened outlet. Alhamdulillah, I got to know the owner is a Malay Muslim and as far as I’m concerned the majority of the GJ franchiser in Malaysia are Malay Muslims. We do have alternative for good coffee, so, please boycott the lady in green outlet. *smirk*
Many things have gone through my mind. And I decided that i should write about how…. to overcome depression. I guess.
Overcoming Depression: My Version
Well, its not a topic that many are capable of comprehending. As many people went through depression without realising that they are actually depressed. For this very reason, many burst out when things go beyond their control and they just went mad.
Well, this topic that I brought up is because of an incident that took place in Bangi, where a father who was unemployed for about a year, lived under depression and burst out by slaughtering his daughters. 2 was critically injured and his youngest daughter died. May Allah SWT rewards the young lady with Jannah, and May Allah SWT forgive the father’s sin.
Many theories from many people went out. Perhaps, due to the economical challenge, may be because of the living cost that is spiking nowadays, may be because of yada yada, one are prone to being depressed in this modern days. No only the adults, the young ones are prone to depression as well. Its just the degree of bursting out differs from one another. Oh, I’ve read news report of a 12 years old girl hang herself because she didn’t get straight A’s for her UPSR. That is so sad, because she have been depressed for so long that she burst out resorting to taking her life away. A healthy mind person would have not been so depressed for having such result, from my humble opinion.
Oh well, let me start talking about how to overcome them. The causes are too many to be stated here. Go hit the keyboard and start googling about depression and its causes. Read up all the medical journals, You’ll know the answer to the Question ‘WHY’ are they depressed. I’m just sharing my own version of overcoming Depression, from my Own Experience. *smile*
Yes, I was there and I am coming out of it.
The biggest challenge for a depressed person is to admit that they are depressed. At many instances the depressed person are not aware of their depression, thus, the denial. So long the person denies the depression, so long that person would be running away from it. Running away from a situation is not helping at all. Face it, the situation will eventually pass by.
I first found out that I was depressed when I noticed that I was unable to share my feelings to my friends and family. I started to feel I want to go far away from where I am, start afresh and meet new people. I want to talk to strangers and forget my old life. And it doesn’t help. I just have that kind of feeling and thought brooding in me everyday.
During that period, I woke up and started to think ‘Why do I have to face this? All of these??’. And I do not know the answer to that. I started to sit on my own, secluded my self to a corner of my rented house and do my own activities. Mostly reminiscing my old happy kids life. Beautiful aye?
Then, I just knew it something is not right somewhere. I was in UNSW when I was depressed. Every time I passed by the Student Help Center, there is a call within my heart. Yearning to be heard of, telling myself I need to talk to someone. And there I went, on one fine day, to let out my heart. I cried in front of a Counsellor and I just knew it that I am depressed and it took a lot of strength and courage to actually burst my feeling and thoughts out to the Counsellor.
And you know what? Writing this post about depression and about myself, is a part of the plan on coming out of depression. Alhamdulillah, I am capable of acknowledging my self for the challenge and experience I had previously. Self acceptance is VERY VERY IMPORTANT in this process of coming out of depression. At least, I know it works for me. *smile*
2. Get Help
One would need to climb out of the valley of darkness. On their own limbs, on their own strength, one their own will. Yes, others could assist, others could help to shed some lights and show one the path towards freeing one self of depression. Yet, the reason why one are still living haunted by depression is because One DID NOT ALLOW ONE SELF TO GET SOME HELP. Yes. They refuse any help from anywhere and anyone.
A depressed person tend to think that ‘I get this’, ‘Everything is under my control’, ‘I know what I’ve got to do’ and so on. However, without they realising it, they actually are circling around their thoughts when they started to think only them have the solution. In many instances, they make decision on their own while they are having clouds and mist and fogs in their mind. Seriously. One thing led to another, one event causes another to happen, more decision seems to add more fuel towards the fire of depression in one self.
Many big decisions in my life are affected by the depression I had. Withdrawing my studies from UNSW, getting into MAHSA College and withdrawing from it, starting a company with a partner and deciding to being self employed in the early career of my life, all of these events cost me a HUGE investment of my money, time and energy. And I learn A LOT from it. Yes, I choose to look at them as an investment that makes me a better me, that helps me to overcome the depression that I had. And Alhamdulillah, as time passed by I saw solutions and more way out.
My life is getting better, Alhamdulillah. Thanks to my family, Mama and Ayah (Daddy) for being there when I call out for help. Thanks to my siblings who shows undivided support when I was at the bottom of my life. Thanks to all Ikhwah for simply being there and share your thoughts when I ask about anything, Thank You for everyone who are in my life now. You are my resources, You are my strength to face the days and may Allah Bless your life for all the good deeds you gave to me. =D
One will need to seek help for overcoming depression. If any of you who are reading this know a friend of yours are depressed, or have some sort of symptoms showing that they are depressed, do offer a helping hand to them. They need it. And they just need someone to show them the way out. And remember, the process of lending your hands to them are not like eating grapes and definitely a piece of cake! A depressed person, they are very delicate and you have to handle that person with car. TLC. Tender Loving and Care. =)
One submission to Allah SWT, the creator of the universe is very helpful. Bowing your head to Him makes you realise, things happen for a reason. There are Wisdoms behind all occurrences. So long one believe in Allah, believe in the Greater Power that Creates the Universe, so long one will have faith and will keep moving forward. When no one is there, Allah is very close to you. He hear your thoughts, He listen to your rant, He understands you more than you understand yourself. Thus, your submission to His Will and His Power and His Wisdom, it really helps you to move forward.
There are many instances that I decided to do something stupid and out of mind. Alhamdulillah, since my early days I’ve been thought of the importance of Solat (Prayer) and the importance of Zikrullah (The Remembrance of Allah). Mama and Ayah are not Ustazah and Ustaz (Religious teacher). They just want their kids have a basic foundation of Islam, thus, teaching us all the basic stuff about Islam. Things they are not capable to teach me, such as Mengaji Quran (reading the quran well), they sent me to learn from an Ustaz and Ustazah. Holding dearly to those principles thought in my early days, it appears to be very helpful nowadays. =D
Many people lose faith, lose hope of life, because they made themselves as the Rabb, the Helper to themselves. Everything is on their own. They fail to realise about the Bigger Power, The Ultimate Creator that creates things and occurrences for reasons. At time, uncomprehend-able. And after sometime, the wisdom are well understood. Thus, if one decides not to submit to the Will of Allah, they are prone to being trapped in the abyss of depression.
Let me hear it out from you!
Alrighty, Thats it! 3 points on how to overcome depression, my own version. If I were to talk about the technical part of overcoming it, such as doing calisthenics workout to burn off excess cortisol hormones and such and such, that would be very lengthy. And I believe its not really practical to everyone as every soul differs from one another. I’d prefer to talk about the main Ideas on how to overcome depression and these are the points that I’ve been practicing so far. If any of you, my readers, have some opinion about this matter, you are most welcome to share your thoughts with me.
Perhaps any of you have some questions about it, I may offer some answers to you. No, I am not an expert nor a doctor that can cure depression. I’m just a person who experienced depression and came out of it, and I would like to offer my hands to help others to understand it as well. Be it to help your friend or to help yourself directly. =D
Talk to you soon!